128. Is this a wedding cake I see before me?

“He’s is going to be studying Macbeth for the literature exam,” Fred’s mum says, as I pack away my highlighters. I’ve started tutoring Fred, who is resitting his English GCSE next month. It’s a learning experience for us both.

“Great! He’ll enjoy that. Witches, ghosts, murder – what’s not to like? And, of course, it’s the shortest play, which has to be a winner.”

“Oh, they’re not reading the whole play,” Fred’s mum tells me. “He just has to look at the character of Lady Macbeth and compare her to that woman in Great Expectations.”

I feel my eyebrows raise.  “So they’re studying Great Expectations?

“Only the bits with Miss Havisham in. But they have watched the film.”

I convey this later to DearHeart and we both agree that it’s Health and Safety gone mad. DH then suggests that Fred focuses on the fact that both women had cleaning issues. It could even become the basis of a TV show: “Will this Wedding Dress ne’er be Clean?” perhaps. They could share a flat, DH suggests, and there could be lots of hilarious business with knives and dusters.

We’re now working on the spin-off. I’m seeing the Weird Sisters plus, perhaps, Mrs Gargery and Mrs Cratchit, in a big tent, with assorted cauldrons and stoves. Things get very nasty when Mrs Cratchit takes one of the Sisters’ packets of chilled frog’s toes out of the freezer to make space for her Christmas Log.



It’s been a while since I nagged you about GiveAsYouLive. If, like me, you’ve been anxious about the state of your washing line, and have just ordered a replacement from Amazon, then you too will have earned a whopping 15p towards finding a Cure for Parkinson’s. Go on, go on, go on, go on. Just click on the link.


Ravishing blog by Aquarius331 with a glorious picture for anyone into Preserves Porn.  Which includes me.



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